From a Cubs fan:
1) Darwin Barney – the second baseman in a certain habitat
2) Xander Bogaerts – the joint, obviously
3) Chase Headley – wacky dog
4) Jackie Robinson
5) Rick Reuschel and Dennis Eckersley – my gods of pitching
6) Sandy Koufax – i hate lefties
7) Hank Aaron – to have a lower body like his
8) Junior Lake
9) Don Zimmer
10) Mike Olt – mike olt to hit the ball
11) Randy Johnson – see #19
12) Angel Pagan – second only to Angel Demonio, who exists in the Dominican Republic, I’m sure of it.
13) Shawon Dunston – meter at .256
14) Adam Eaton – SHORT POWER!
15) Mike Maddux, who got the wrong genes, and lacked the craziness of Greg.
16) Steve Stone (and his dogs)
17) Manzano Rico
18) James Russell, specialist to get out lefties adequately
19)) Lance Johnson, Penis Penis, essentially, 1_Dog. Get your pets spayed or neutered.
20) Turk Wendell, who later may have went crazy